AWTR Show 304: At Ease, Soldier!

Presents Army Wife Talk Radio

AWTR Show 304: Week of Feb 28, 2011

Join the AWN team this week on Army Wife Talk Radio for a conversation with Dr Gayle Rozantine author of the book “At Ease..Soldier!” Check out the book at http://soldiersathome.com/ - we’ll be discussing how to help your soldier leave the war downrange and feel at home again.

Resource of the Week: Christmas Spirit Foundation - Trees for Troops

We’ll see you in LIVE CHAT starting at 8pm Eastern.

Visit Army Wife Network and Loving A Soldier Blog
Click here to download the MP3

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Following Through With New Year's Resolutions

It’s time for a check up on those resolutions!

What goals did you make for your household last month? Maybe you wanted to be more
organized, make mornings smoother, or help your family eat healthier? Now that we’re
two months into 2011, it’s a great time to stop for a moment and assess your progress.

If you’re like me, it’s a bit hit or miss. Winter is dragging on and the kids (and adults!)
might be getting restless and ready for spring. PCS season is around the corner, orders are
starting to come down and many military families are waiting to hear if they’ll be starting
a new adventure this summer. It’s not quite time for spring cleaning but the indoors can
be feeling cramped. All of that makes this a great time to take a look at whether or not
our routines are setting us up for success.

To learn more about how I use Family Manager to set my home up for success,
check out the February Household 6 article on Army Wife Network

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Engineer Red

Deployment. Some say this is the most difficult time in one's lifetime and I would definitely agree. These months have been life-changing and some trials that make it more difficult, but I would say it's all for good in the end. Situations like these make you care for the important things in life and appreciate what you have--that's called being content.

Although one could compare this type of 'leave of absence' to certain other life experiences, none compare to this level of commitment, duty, and honor--than a Soldier defending for His(Her)country.

As I go through this deployment, I have found that the most difficult to withstand during this time is the physical absence of my husband. Yes, I am truly grateful that I am able to communicate with him via mail, phone, or Internet, but nothing (and I mean NOTHING) beats a great big hug after a long, stressful day.


Right now I am attending a bible study specifically geared towards military spouses and deployments. I have come to really appreciate this time with other military spouses in different phases of a military career. Some brand new, some seasoned, some being the first (deployment), and others with a few under her belt. I am really thankful for this group of ladies. We have come to share stories, laughter, and sometimes tears...

I'd like to share a story, since it's my story, I am allowed to. The one thing I have trouble with since he left, is trying to get enough sleep. I shared this with them and since there was suggestions within the study guide--one being--get a body pillow. Okay...I am going to go get it. The Exchange of course had some (but didn't have any body pillow covers--figures), I got in line and I actually saw two other ladies with a body pillow in the check out aisles. I felt like we were all in the same boat. You know the "My husband is not here, so I am buying a imitation husband" type of thought or maybe it was just me...

It sounds reasonable and rational, the pillow should work--right? Wrong. I suppose to a normal person it would be, but with hardly any sleep and four kids to manage my weary mind thought of something else-at first response. Okay I am going try it. I get the pillow out of the plastic cover...and tried to get comfortable enough to go to sleep.

"This better freaking work." I need to get some serious sleep people. Really. I wrapped my leg and arm around it and laid there for a minute or two... To my complete irrational mind (at the moment)--I felt I had betrayed my husband by 'sleeping with another.' "Seriously, this can't be happening." --is what I was thinking. This is going to be a very LONG deployment.

At the next group meeting, I felt I had to share my reaction to the 'body pillow.' I told them that I felt I was having an 'affair' with the pillow!!! Instead of getting sympathy, everyone got a good laugh about it. Just kidding. It was meant to be laughed at!! I cried a bit (either from embarrassment, stupidity, and/or I just needed to cry). I did feel better afterwards however.

I mean seriously, even though I wasn't a virtuous woman (like I should have been) when I married my husband at age 19, it's been almost 14 years with this one man. Not having my husband around to cuddle with is a very big adjustment no matter how many times you go without the love of your life.

One of the ladies suggested I put one of my husband's t-shirts on it, or cologne, or his picture on it. So, the next week I had to take my son to his ortho. appointment at another nearby installation and I went to their Exchange (PX), lo and behold, they had body pillow COVERS! I found the perfect one. Engineer Red. Since my husband is an Engineer, I found the color quite fitting for my "substitute husband."

Now that I have my rational mind intact now, a new Engineer Red cover for my body pillow--I can now say that we are friends. Platonic friends--if you get my drift. So, has the pillow helped at all?? Umm...still hard to decide on that one. I am still struggling with going to bed at a decent hour, but at least I know that it's only a temporary friendship until the Husband comes back.

Though, I really get a kick out of saying to it from time to time, "Not tonight Honey, I have a headache." (ACTUALLY LAUGHING OUT LOUD) Oh, the things we must do in order to stay positive during a deployment...

A merry heart doeth good [like] a medicine: but a broken spirit drieth the bones. -Proverbs 17:22

Jessica S.

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peace and quiet

I kicked my husband out of the house the other night.

After almost five years of marriage, two combat deployments and another coming up soon, two national training center rotations and another within weeks, countless field training exercises, calls away from home in the middle of the night, two kids, two cats, dealing with friends who have been killed or wounded in action, dealing with in laws and friends who don’t understand our lifestyle, and missed holidays, I FINALLY kicked him out.



He had it coming. I mean, he comes home at the end of a long work day and tends to me and the kids with whatever we need. After helping with and sometimes completely making dinner, he puts the kids to bed, and then picks up the house if I haven’t already. Some nights, he even surprises me with flowers for no reason. Don’t even get me started on how dedicated he is to his soldier’s on top of his family. He constantly goes out of his way for them, and it doesn’t matter if they were an old soldier or a new one! He never puts himself first, and I had enough of it!

Don’t worry readers, I kicked him out just for the weekend. He needed it, and I’m honestly surprised I didn’t do it sooner. He has constantly been going and going like the energizer bunny, with no rest. He’s either being a top notch father or a top notch leader. He NEVER puts himself first unless he’s forced to. I’m sure many of your husbands are the same as well. Lately, I can tell the exhaustion was getting to him and I felt that he needed a “time out.” So, I told him that I loved him, but he was going to a hotel room for the weekend. At first, he wasn’t so thrilled, but he warmed up to it by the time Friday evening rolled around and he had been busy at work all day.

For once he got COMPLETE quiet. No kids to wrangle and no problems to solve at work for 24hrs! I made him leave his cell phone with me after promising that I would call him if he was needed. He got to just lay in bed and be completely bored for once. He slept from 9pm until 1230pm the next day and the only reason why he got up at that point was because he was hungry. The peace and quiet did wonders for him and he is in such a better mood than he has been in a long time.

In our marriage, most of the time the two if us are so consumed with finding chances to give me, the spouse, a break from our hectic and unpredictable life, that we forget that he, the soldier, needs a break as well. It was nice to put him first and make him take a time out and get the rest he needed. We have decided that we are going to send him away every few months now as the budget allows.

What kind of things do you do to assure your soldier is getting the rest he needs?

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Happy Friday!

Happy Friday my friends! It is yet the end of another insanely busy week. Right now, I am teaching full time, co-directing a spring musical at a local high school, singing in a Symphony Chorus that is preparing for a HUGE festival in May where we sing a different set of rep. every night of the festival, and a thousand other things.


I was kind of glad when I was told that I didn't have to show up for the inservice day today at school. Instead, I met with the organist friend of mine whose church I'll be canting at this weekend, and then I drove over to see my good friend and fellow Army wife, Melanie. Hanging out with Mel today was such a great end to my insane week.

It's the end of February and I'm starting to feel slightly burned out. I am ready for the spring musical to be over, in all honesty. Only a couple-few more weeks and it will be! It has been a great experience and something I can also add to my resume. At the same time, I am ready for it to be over. In another sense, I, as a performer, am always looking for more sinigng gigs (weddings, church solo jobs, etc.). I've been contemplating adding voice lessons back into my schedule - but do I really want to add something else?

To add to all this, the May Festival is quickly approaching. I'm still trying to decide if it's going to be ok or not. My wonderful husband will be in the field during the craziest time of the festival and will actually miss all the performances. While that's great because I won't have time for him during those couple weeks, what do we do about our dog? We have a needy puppy. Harry is a HIGHLY energetic Australian Cattle Dog (aka Blue Heeler). Doggie Day Care is expensive, but we might have to suck it up and do it. During those couple weeks, I will be working all day, only to come home for 90 minutes - 2 hours and then leave for a 4 hour rehearsal. Harry is going to need some serious love when all of this is through.

Right now, I truly enjoy my weekends when I have nothing planned (which is not normal for me). I have never ever felt that way before in my life, as I'm the go, go, go kind of girl. Recently, a lot has happened to make me realize that I need to slow down once in awhile.

My mother-in-law, whom I am VERY close to (and she's also a retired Army Wife) recently had a heart attack. That scared the bejeebers out of me! Then, right after that happened, I got hit with the flu. Not only was it the flu, but I had the swine flu - again (I had it a year and a half ago). This was NOT fun. I laid in bed for 3 days with a 104 fever and felt like death. I actually had to call in sick to work - a job that I absolutely love. I'm learning to kind of slow down so that I don't get too run down.

In the middle of this, all I think about is lesson plans I need to prepare, the 2nd grade musical that's less than 1 month away, etc. My brain NEVER slows down. If I wake up in the middle of the night, I have a hard time falling back asleep because my brain starts running and doesn't stop. I guess it's time to start really running again so that my brain gets that thought time. I also can use the exercise as unwind time. I sure need it.

To sum it all up, my calendar is crazy. I have days I leave my house at 7:30 am and I don't get home until after 10 pm. I want to sing for anyone who will listen. At the same time, I need some ME time. Hopefully, I can slow it down a little so that I can hang out with some of my best Army wife girls!

I know we all have crazy busy lives, as Army wives. What do you do for stress relief and/or ME time??????

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AWN BOOK CLUB

Greetings fellow book clubbers! As announced on Mondays show, the new book of the month this month will be Chicken Soup For the Military Wifes Soul. I look forward to hopping around in the book, since you don't have to read it chapter by chapter, and surely I will have some tissue on hand! Join me in the read and let me know what you think! To purchase at a great price, click the attached link in this blog! Happy trails!

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Hero's at Home...

I think most of you know by now that I am the wife of an American Hero… a Soldier. What most of you do not know is that I am the niece, cousin, daughter, granddaughter and best friend of equal men and women. While many from my family and friends were Soldiers also, they now stand ready to serve here on the home front. They have wives, husbands and children… their lives are in danger daily; they sacrifice so we can sleep safely in our beds. While our Soldiers are serving heroically globally, these men and women serve on the sometimes angry streets of America. I am as equally proud of them as I am my very own hero.

As America struggles to stand firmly on it’s own proverbial feet economically, the most desperate of people act out. Some will chalk it up to a “War on Cops”; maybe, but I’m not buying it. When the economy crashes, people go just a little crazy- but that’s a whole other story. Still, the facts remain that, in 2011 alone, 27 Police Officers have been killed in the line of duty (this number includes the Saint Petersburg, Florida Officer killed just last night); it’s only February. Their families, like us, worry. They watch them walk out the door fearing they may never walk back in. We need to support them. Our soldiers leave one grueling, earth shattering time for their tour of duty; theirs leave daily.

Don’t get me wrong, I know what’s it’s like to watch my soldier leave. To have to explain to our children why his side of the bed remains made for the most part. Why I set his place at our table, even though he’s not going to be joining us. I’m not going to compare a year-long deployment with a 40 hour work week. I just want to create awareness. I recently heard the wife of a Police officer, and a school teacher herself describe how her hero flashed his cruiser lights every day before leaving for work for his small children. The day he was murdered, he ran them for an uncommonly long time. He did that every day… how does she now explain that they will never see those lights flash in their drive way again? No, there is no comparison, but there are so many similarities. The fear must be very close to the same…

As an Army wife, I have been so honored and privileged with the support that we are given by the people and the government of the great U.S.A! There will never be enough words to express what it means that, for the most part, the nation has my back. But, it’s time for us to give back. We need to empower our sisters and brothers in arms. Let them know that we are here for them and that we support them. We know the fear they feel each day as they watch their hero leave for their “tour of duty” on the mean streets of America. We appreciate their sacrifice. Ultimately, we get it…we really do.

So, to my cousins who serve on the mean streets of Detroit (these guys were Soldiers first), my father (also a soldier first) who served before them, my best friends who serve in our Federal Law Enforcement Community, and all of my friends serving as Police Officers in New York and Florida THANK YOU! You keep me safe when my hero keeps our Nation safe. Your family makes the sacrifice daily… I SUPPORT them fearlessly and I THANK them!

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AWTR Show 303: Keeping love alive AFTER Valentine's Day!

Presents Army Wife Talk Radio

AWTR Show 303: Week of Feb 21, 2011

Join the AWN team this week on Army Wife Talk Radio for a conversation with author & speaker Kevin Decker. Kevin, an AWTR regular, will be discussing (and sharing creative ideas) what to do to keep love alive after Valentine’s Day has come and gone!

Resource of the Week: Dog Tags for Kids

We’ll see you in LIVE CHAT starting at 8pm Eastern.
Visit Army Wife Network and Loving A Soldier Blog
Click here to download the MP3

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Find Your Resources!

Well the hubby is off to recruiting school. I am excited for him and will pray every night that he does well and that he is doing ok. Hopefully Tuesday we will find out where we are going to be recruiting after he graduates from school. I have been waiting for so long to see where this Army journey will take us next. I am looking forward to a new place. Recently I have been feeling that “itch” if you know what I mean. After about two or three years you begin to almost want to PCS and explore a new place.

I am excited about the prospect of PCS’ing, but it is all the steps that are involved in PCS’ing that I dread, lol. Once we know where we will be going, I will be able to begin researching this new area and begin those first steps towards another PCS. Thankfully there are tons of great resources out there to help make our PCS’s that much easier. Of course, Army Wife Network being one of them J !! MilitaryAvenue.com is another great site to help ease those PCS pains. While at a post, you also have your Relocation Assistance Manager at ACS. I definitely plan on stopping in there.

Just know that there are always resources out there to help you whether you are PCS’ing, looking for local services, or just need a battle buddy! I think it is important for spouses to know that they are not alone on this journey. Empower yourself and find the resources you need to live your best Army Wife Life!

Hooah!

Janet

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The new (and old) Military Wife

In the past month, I have been introduced to a few new military spouses. Some marine, some Army, and lots of Airforce. It is so wonderful to meet fresh, unbiased people and to catch a glimpse through their new eyes of the military life. They are unfazed, unbiased, and for lack of a better terms "undeploymented"- yup, I made that one up. I have been so thrilled to work with them and have open discussions about fears, concerns, questions, and things to look forward to- all with the hopes that I can keep their positive spirit up, and so they know that I am here for them to help hold their hands as things progress.

It has really opened my eyes to the fact that sometimes, I get myself really wrapped around the "ARMY" way of things. How often is it that you take time to reach out to the other spouses, no matter the branch or time in? I am learning so much about the differences, however, I am also learning about so many similarities. One spouse may not be gone as long as the other, or in the same places, but they are all serving our country and we all have similar emotions. We are left to tend to the home front, worry about our military member, and most importantly care for ourselves and our families and keep things running like a well oiled machine. (Well, mine gets a little squeaky sometimes and needs some TLC, but you get my drift.

Not only are the new spouses helping me to reopen the eyes that seem to have become a little over focused- but I recall during my time at Fort Bragg, my 91 year old neighbor, Ms. Elma. She was a WWII spouse and while my husband was deployed I spent many hours on her couch. (Not to mention, she was an awesome "grandma" for me and made a mean cherry pie.) She shared with me the letters that her husband sent and her stories of waiting weeks to get one. They didn't have Skype, the news, or long distance phones, let alone cell phones or emails. I felt blessed for her to have let me into her life, and to just sit and listen to her stories. I only wish that I could have met her husband while he was still alive, just listening to their love story sounded like it belonged in a Nicholas Sparks book and gave me shivers and reminded me of how proud I am to say that I AM A MILITARY WIFE. We are a sisterhood of young and old and we have a rare bond. She helped me once again, to refocus. No matter when we experienced this life, for how long, or in what branch....there is so much love and so many stories attached.

The toast I gave at my sisters wedding reminds me of what I am writing in this blog about new and seasoned eyes. "May the love you share be modern enough to keep up with the times, and old fashioned enough to last forever."

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Fort Bliss... My Favorite "hidden gem" in the way of Army Posts

Ahhhh.... Fort Bliss. I don't even know where to start except to tell you that its not as bad as some will most definitely tell you. I remember when the news came down that we were going to Fort Bliss well. Most of time, people would express their sincere apologies and concern upon learning El Paso would be our next stop on this journey... here's what I have to say about that.

Let me begin waaaay back in 2005 when I learned that Fort Bliss would be our first stop on this Army journey. Being prior Air Force, we had been stationed at Davis-Monthan Air Force Base in Tucson, Arizona. To say that I was really looking forward to moving east again is an understatement. Not once did I allow the thought that we would stay in the desert pass through my mind. In fact, I was so sure we were moving east that, while my new Officer Candidate was in school, I packed up our family and headed from Tucson back to our home in Florida. Not four weeks later, I learned that we would be moving to El Paso; a short 4 hour drive from Tucson. To say I was disappointed would be an understatement.

After all of the negative feed back regarding Fort Bliss, I must say that I probably did not give it a fair shake with an open mind upon arrival. I would say it took me a year to get used to the fact that I could see Mexico from my daughter's bedroom window. It felt for all intents and purposes like I lived in a foreign country. Going to Walmart near post was, well, an experience. Honestly, it took about a year for me to discover all of the "hidden gem" qualities. Once I did, there was no turning back. To this very day Fort Bliss has remained my favorite military installation (note that I said "military" installation).

Fort Bliss has everything a city girl could possibly want. The shopping in El Paso is WONDERFUL compared to cities near most Army posts. Fort Bliss has the newest and most modern Exchange in the Military (www.freedomcrossingatfortbliss.com). Not only does the Exchange have all of the old things your used to, but so much more. The restaurant scene is also amazing, and cheap! The housing on post is incomparable- they really did a great job when thinking about "families" and convenience. Now, I'll admit that housing is a work in progress, but for the most part, the new stuff is to die for. And, the people of El Paso, for the most part love the soldiers and families. Are there a few that don't? Sure, but that comes with the territory.

To this day, I miss Fort Bliss, and the friends I made in our tight knit, on post community there. Head on over to Army Wife Network and find all you need to know about Fort Bliss in our Post with the Most section. So, take all of the negative comments you will hear, and form your own opinion.

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Post with the Most...Making the Most of your Post

One of my biggest issues prior to coming here was all the negative feedback I was getting about our soon to be post and pretty much life on any Post in Germany. Nothing to do but beer drinking, domestic issues and cheating husbands so once I got here I was pleasantly surprised when things to me were not as described so I started blogging about my experiences and life on my post.
First thing about our post I noticed was that it is more of a little community which makes up a large family making life here so much more enjoyable. So I jumped right in and made it my home I joined our Spouse & Civilians Club, FRG, Battalion Coffees & PWOC. I made it a point to try to attend as many events, activities & get togethers as I can I truly believe that having good friends makes life better no matter where you are.
My biggest goal was that my daughters would make friends and really feel like this was home since this is their first time being Army Bratz. I think that it's important to research your post and see what it offers for yourself, your children and your family. In my case our post is small however they do have bowling alley, movie theater and a teen center all of these are really important for your pre-teen and teenagers. One of the biggest gripes that I noticed here was not enough activities, classes, events being offered at our post all of them were offered at our sister post 30 mins away ugh who wants to have to make that drive all the time, gas, time, ugh bad weather plus why should we have to go to another post when it could just as easily be offered at our post?
Something I advocate very vocally is if you want something offered on your post speak up attend your community meetings, grass roots meetings, fill out an Ice Comment for your post, inquire on your posts facebook page without people saying what's on their minds and asking for changes to be made nothing will happen. I truly believe that it's up to us to better what community we are in.  YES you might just be one little Army Wife in the cog of the Army Wife wheel but it only takes one voice, one idea, one dream to create a change...YOU COULD BE THE ONE TO BRING ABOUT CHANGE.
Well we are now in the process of making our post a Post with the Most SKIES, EDGE, MWR, BOSS, CYS have heard our roar and they are working hard to get us all the classes, activities and events we've asked for. Me personally I am working on bringing AWANA to our post I truly believe our kids should be able to enjoy all the activities just like they would if we were civilians. My challenge to you is to make the most of your post what can you do to better your experience, your families experience at your post? Have you helped make a change? or do you see where a change could be made? I'd love to hear what's going on at your post

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Down to One Word

I think it's a special kind of madness that exactly six weeks after the inspirational giddiness of New Years Resolutions we celebrate Valentine's Day with rich meals and sweets.

I was thinking about that fact a couple days ago while I was washing dishes. Strange housework thoughts? Maybe. I often have random ideas while cleaning. {See how random that was....I guess it's not just when I'm cleaning that I have random thoughts.}

On this particular day, my wandering thoughts circled around to something I had been journaling about. Several blogs that I read had posted about finding "my/their word". Essentially, it was about finding one word to focus on for the year. Some people found a word that dealt with hopes and dreams, some came up with a word that reflected where they are in their personal journey. So many words, so many unique perspectives.

I have been unable to come up with a word. I found phrases that seemed to sort of fit. But not a word.

Until I was cleaning up dinner dishes and grumbling about the effect of Valentine's Day on my weight loss efforts.  

Calibrate. 

It's something I was missing. When I think about what I want out of 2011, all my thoughts center around keeping myself and my family focused on what is important to us. Keeping our priorities straight and acting accordingly. If we make decisions based on those priorities, then 2011 will be fabulous.

So my 2011 has a theme. Calibrate. I use the verb form intentionally. I will calibrate myself on a regular basis. Keep those priorities in the forefront of my mind. I'll get off track, but by calibrating, I'll get right back on.

And that's good.

So, what's your word?

cal·i·brate

–verb (used with object), -brat·ed, -brat·ing.

to determine, check, or rectify the graduation of (any instrument giving quantitative measurements).

to divide or mark with gradations, graduations, or other indexes of degree, quantity, etc., as on a thermometer, measuring cup, or the like.

to determine the correct range for (an artillery gun, mortar, etc.) by observing where the fired projectile hits.

to plan or devise (something) carefully so as to have a precise use, application, appeal, etc.: a sales strategy calibrated to rich investors. (from dictionary.com)

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AWTR Show 302: Improve Your Marriage, Don't Overlook the Obvious!

Presents Army Wife Talk Radio

AWTR Show 302: Week of Feb 14, 2011

Join the AWN team this week on Army Wife Talk Radio for a conversation with author Russ Irving. His book “Improve Your Marriage – Don’t Overlook the Obvious” will offer us everyday life tips on keeping our marriages strong.



Resource of the Week: Military Tax Center

We’ll see you in LIVE CHAT starting at 8pm Eastern.

Visit Army Wife Network and Loving A Soldier Blog
Click here to download the MP3

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Book Club- Under the Sabers Summary

Wow. What a book. To start, I have to say this was a wonderfully written book. The eye for detail and the phrasing made it possible for me to place myself in so many of the situations and feel like I was right there. Having lived at Fort Bragg, I could clearly picture exactly where she was talking about. To those of you that have not been there, she painted a very detailed picture of post to help you feel like you already have been there or can at least picture what she is describing. That being said. I really enjoyed this read, however, one must read it with a very open mind, that it is about a handful of families in one specific place. The book was based on soldiers and families during the early parts of the war and follows spouses of the 82nd Airborne Division, Special Forces, and Delta Force, all based out of Fort Bragg and is written after a string of murders had affected post. I felt that there were many times, like the different holiday parties for example that I really could relate but I felt like there were other parts in the book that I started to really feel like there was a lot dwelling on the things that go wrong in this life, be it death, infidelity, etc. rather than how amazing and fun it can be. If you are a seasoned army wife, you have probably met your share of these characters, but I have to bet that you have also met some spouses that are just wonderful, happy and content in this life. I enjoyed that for an "outsider" reading this, they would learn about many of the hardships of the Army life....PCSing, Single Parenting, & Deployment to name a few- but personally, I don't feel it depicted the "full picture" of us. Grant it, nobody would want to read about all the happy as clams wives, that though some days we feel like we are about to go bonkers, we have our "I hate the Army" days, or the kids have us feeling like shaving our heads so we don't in fact tug all of our hair out....we are in love with our soldiers and this life is something we wouldn't trade for the world. I did find myself giggling when they kept talking about how wonderfully decorated and to the nines some homes were, I think some would think this might not be true (as I had thought my first time reading)....but I experienced firsthand that while no, my home is not one of them (then again....can I just pretend it is?) but there are some homes on post that are like that. If you ever get a chance to do a "Christmas Tour of Homes" DO IT and try to find a cute way to keep your hand on your chin as you gawk to prevent from drooling and dream of somedays, heheh. All in all....I personally really enjoyed the book. I learned some, laughed a little, and cried...a LOT. I would recommend reading it- but like I said, read it and just enjoy it as is. It is a no holds bar look at some very specific happenings to very specific people. It does not glorify nor sugarcoat things which is what I really enjoyed. Find yourself relating to the different people at different times. I have read it multiple times, and each time I find myself relating to something new, depending on what stage of Army life we are in at that time. I would rate this book a "B" A- Buy 2. One for you and a friend. Prepare to wither in the tub as you read it because you will find it helpful and enjoyable. You will reread. B- A good read. Good to have on hand with some useful tips and helpful hints that might be nice to come back to once in awhile. C- Give it a whirl. You might find something for yourself in it. D- If you see it in the sale bin pick it up and try it- you've got nothing to lose if you're 10 pages in and end up using it as a cup coaster.

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Introducing SargesList.com - Military Classifieds

Enjoy Craigslist but not the feeling of distrust? Introducing a new classifieds built specifically for military communities! SargesList.com, featured in the Military Times and billed as the “military craigslist,” is the perfect place to buy, sell, donate and connect with members of the military family during PCS and everyday living. Service members prefer to deal with other military members and those who register with their (dot)MIL email will receive an exclusive icon to help identify other military participants.

David Palmer, Retired Army LTC says, “SargesList has the usability of craigslist but with a safer feel.” “SargesList is awesome, and the great thing is that you are networking with a lot of our military troops and families!” from Sharon Holmes, Housing Office Rep, MCAS Beaufort, S.C.

To help lighten the HHG load and put money in your pocket for PCS, SargesList has 500 military installations worldwide, including categories for household goods, vehicles and real estate as well as sections for yard sales, local events, military support, boutiques and savings. “It’s perfect for the couple heading to Germany, for example, with no transformers or 220-volt kitchen appliances. Or, for the family heading home who does not want to keep those kinds of items,” shares Hank Coleman from Military Money Might.

SargesList is looking for local leaders to post listings and share them via their social networks! Registration and basic listings are free, including 5 photos. We’re yet building our military clientele and listings on SargesList. In the meantime, create an alert on your profile and receive notice once a listing is placed that matches what you need!

Post a listing this month and be automatically entered for a chance to win an Apple iPad. Next Drawing will be March 1st! Be the first to post a listing in your area today!! Visit us on Facebook.

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AWTR Show 301: Power of Two Marriage

Presents Army Wife Talk Radio

AWTR Show 301: Week of Feb 7, 2011

Join the AWN team this week on Army Wife Talk Radio for a conversation with Power of Two Marriage (http://poweroftwomarriage.com/). We’ll be discussing tips on successful marriages and insight on military marriages.

Resource of the Week: Military Spouse Foundation.

We’ll see you in LIVE CHAT starting at 8pm Eastern.
Visit Army Wife Network and Loving A Soldier Blog
Click here to download the MP3

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AWN February Newsletter

You can sign up on the sidebar for blog updates, show announcements and newsletters right to your inbox. Or for February's newsletter, just click HERE!

Our downloadable newsletters are in a printable format in order that you may distribute--easily--to your spouse clubs, family groups, your chain of command and concern, and others within your Army Wife Network. They are two-sided, single sheets, which offer the best resources, URLs, and articles we gather each month.

They are created and copyrighted by Army Wife Network, but they are YOURS to personalize and circulate.

There are small editable regions for you to update your local network on calendar events and contact data. You can brand it with your name as subtext to the Army Wife Network name.

Send the issues home with the service member, post them on unit bulletin boards, email them to your distro list, or post them to your Web site. Tell us the ways you've found best to get the word out. We can share that as a "hot tip" in our next newsletter.

Happy Valentine's Day Army Wives!

I read a quote earlier today that said "Real love is trading your pearls for his dog tags." Isn't that the truth? Army life has it's challenges that is for certain. But, there are many reasons to love being an Army wife. We asked our Facebook fans what they thought and I thought I'd share a few of the team's favorite answers:

I am in love with and married to an American Hero! How many people can say that?

It is an honor to be a military spouse. People who told me waiting through a deployment would all be worth it at homecoming and they were right! There is no other feeling like that.

The diversity of the people. The diversity of places that you live. The people that you meet along the way...good or bad...and the lessons you learn if you are open enough to accept them.

Being a soldier is the most difficult job in the world and I am proud to stand by the one who does it.

Speaking of Facebook, I recently worked on an interview and article with Jason & Kelli Krafsky of http://www.fbmarriage.com/ for Valentine's Day. One of my favorite parts of this interview was their tips on keeping your "love" alive when you're disconnected (geographically or otherwise). Here are a few I wanted to pass onto you during this "season of love"!

DO: Make your spouse the topic of your Status Updates at least once a week. Using Facebook to affirm and build up your spouse creates a deeper bond between the two of you, and a higher fence around the two of you. (Just be careful not to overdo and become an annoying couple.)

DON'T: Write cutting remarks or negative statements about your spouse. Even though Facebook asks, "What's on your mind," it doesn't mean everyone really wants to know the answer to that question.  If in doubt, think about how your comments will be read by others (think about your mother-in-law, your boss, your pastor) before pushing the Share/Comment button.

DO: Create boundaries to protect yourself, your spouse and your marriage. Spend some time talking about what's in bounds and out of bounds and as a couple, agree on what boundaries you'll set as a couple.  A little bit of agreement on what is and is not acceptable can save a lot of pain and disagreement later.

DON'T: Lose track of how much time you spend on Facebook. Everyone needs a little down time to unwind each day.  Facebook can be a great way to wind down (e.g. connect with FB Friends, play games, find Groups and Fan Pages, etc). On average, users spend 12-15 minutes a day on Facebook. That seems like a healthy dose of daily Facebook intake. If time on the online social community infringes on your real-time marriage relationship, make changes to reprioritize your time.  Set a timer for 15 minutes and then log off Facebook and turn off the computer.

We have a wonderful line up of guests and information ready for you on our radio show this month. Join us at 8pm EST every Monday night! We will continue to bring you expert advice columns, care package ideas, newbie resources, Field Problems^(TM) answers, and up to date military related information through all of our outlets. So be sure to stop by the main page, the blog, as well as the Facebook page this week and check it out!

Your Lipstick 6,Tara Crooks

P.S. You must download your newsletter to see what wonderful guests we have lined up for you this month.

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A PT Student and Her Soldier

Honestly, blogging scares me. Why you may ask? It scares me because you are putting your thoughts out there for others to view and judge, which makes you vulnerable. Thus, when asked to do this blog, I was very hesitant until my fiancé said this might be a way to grow and also help other women out there realize we aren’t alone. The next step was to figure out a topic that would relate to someone reading this. I came up with loving a man in uniform makes you more vulnerable than the rest of the population, but it is okay.

After being with my soldier for almost four years, the life lesson I have learned is that you are vulnerable to having your feelings hurt at least once a week that relates to the military lifestyle. For me, it is constantly being judged harshly for the long distance lifestyle my fiancé and I currently live. Close to 2 years ago we learned that come Summer 2009, my fiancé would be taking a trip to the sand box and I decided to continue pursing schooling. It was hard to start school all alone and meeting new people who couldn’t believe for the whole year I was constantly staring at my phone waiting to hear his voice. No matter how many times you explain your situation, people just don’t get it. Unfortunately, once he returned to the states his job took him to one coast and schooling has kept me on the other. Thus, the constant criticism of why can’t he get restationed near you and very patiently you explaining this isn’t how the military works. Did I mention the long hours that he puts in the office? Often I find myself waiting in bed after a long day of school and waking up in the morning to my light still on and cell phone in hand. The hard part is I can't complain to my friends because they can't relate. However, I remember no matter how many times I am vulnerable to getting my feelings hurt because of the military lifestyle, my life wouldn’t be complete without his love. Also, how many women can say after a long time apart they still get butterflies in their stomach when they see their man come off the plane in uniform?

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"No School" but still Lessons Learned!

Oh my goodness! Did the rest of you get hit by this winter storm like we did here in Oklahoma? This is our third winter here at Fort Sill and though it was nothing like last year's record breaking ice storm (power & water loss for days!) this past week's snow and ice storm shut down schools & businesses (even post) for a few days.

I'll admit that on Monday night the excitement of the impending storm and the preparation for loss of power/heat carried me through the announcement of "no school" on Tuesday. Tuesday actually ended up being a fun day, watching the storm blow in while we sat by the fire.  We were one of the lucky ones who had our Daddy home with us and so it was a fun little family day all tucked in. What's one day off of work? We'll catch up tomorrow. Sieze the day!

Tuesday night piled in front of the TV watching for the school closings.....there it is...."no school". The children rejoiced! I thought, what's another day? We can catch up on household chores. (This is a joke. Have you ever tried to make your kids do something during a snow day? No way man! What was I thinking? )

Then, came Wednesday morning. Wednesday I woke up sick (ok, I felt it coming on Tuesday but I didn't admit it and was really fighting it). Daddy went back to work as "mission essential personnel". There was still a ton of snow atop a layer of ice. The post was still closed. I still had work. I still had kids. It was going to be a rough day. Thank goodness I'm a part of an Army family and that I have great neighbors who's children kept the kids busy most of Wednesday while I stole a few naps. One of the things they did - that was DELICIOUS - was make snow ice cream. Have you ever made this? I was surprised with a cup of it and let me tell you - even though it was cold outside - the ice cream hit the spot. Here's the recipe just in case you're stuck in the snow and get a sweet tooth:

Ingredients
•8 cups snow, or shaved ice
•1 (14-ounce) can sweetened condensed milk
•1 teaspoon vanilla extract

Directions
Place snow or shaved ice into a large bowl. Pour condensed milk over and add vanilla. Mix to combine. Serve immediately in bowls

Guess what the annoucement was Wednesday night? Yes, you've got it, "no school". Still feeling ill, I really didn't care what they did but I knew that I wasn't sure what I was going to do with the kids for another day. So, I started digging for random things to do. (This is when you really start to LOVE teachers and appreciate them even more. Especially when you know there is no way in hell you could ever be one.)

I bet you can relate that by Thursdsay I was feeling a bit stir crazy from being inside all week and so were the kids. We managed to venture out with our neighbors into the local area and visit Wal-Mart. I needed more medicine as I had now completely lost my voice (probably from all of the hacking coughing I'd been doing), and we needed some food staples.

If you've ever lived at Fort Sill you know that the local Wal-Mart is about your only choice for shopping off post. And if you've ever lived in Lawton America (as it is so lovingly called) you would understand that this trip was by far the highlight of my week. Never in your life will you see the kinds of things that you will see at a Wal-Mart near a military installation. It's a treat for the eyes and great laughter for the soul! I came back to the house a new woman. Either Wal-Mart saved me or I found some great new drugs there that dried up all the snot and I started to think more clearly. Friday was going to be a better day. I was going to hit that to-do list with gusto! Life was going back to "normal" and order would be restored. Until the darn news came on and the school system updated their Facebook page - "no school".

Dang it! Oh well, none of that stuff needed to be done anyway right? I gave in. Ya, ok, so what that it took until Friday of a four day "no school' snow day week for me to get on board? Don't be a hater. I'm just slow at my epiphanys! I moved the to do list to next week. Tucked in Thursday night with my super Equate brand nighttime medicine and swore that Friday would be a new day!

And it was, armed with a plan of snow activities, crafting, movie day, & scheduled naps - we've managed to make it to the weekend.

I learned alot this week, some of it I did already know:  I am a perfectionist. I cannot stand disorder. I don't like it when plans change. I really like my structure and routine. I don't like being sick. Snow is messy. Wind chill is cold. Pipes freeze. Historical housing is cold & drafty. Every HOOAH soldier thinks they are "mission essential" even if they're not. Good neighbors are AWESOME! I love to craft with my kids. Nothing is as sweet as little girls "taking care of you" when they know that "mama" is sick.

But I also learned things I didn't know: Oprah is on at 4pm every weekday. Bo & Hope are still on Days of Our Lives (and so is Stephano DiMera? who knew?). The heavier the person the faster they slide. Young children don't understand why the snow is yellow until you explain it. It is perfectly acceptable to wear your pajamas to Wal-Mart in Lawton with plastic snow boots and a tank top. It can get below 0 in the South. Short dogs shouldn't assume the snow drifts are sturdy (maybe the dog learned this not me?). When it snows, people spend entirely too much time on Facebook. I'm the only one stressing that my "job" isn't being done. And...Snow cream ROCKS!

A crazy week of weather and "no school" but there were definitely still lessons learned.

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Hamburger Buddy

Have you ever tried to make your own version of Hamburger Helper, only to have it become a disaster or taste awful? This month at Army Wife Network Mess Hall, we are going to use this recipe. After making a trip to the commissary, we'll discuss the price, the time, and the quality.

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Our first trip to a German Emergency Room

Last night we had our first medical adventure here in Germany. By medical adventure, I mean that as Murphy would have it, our first visit to a German hospital wasn’t by choice or leisure, it was for an actual emergency.

Since the moment we moved into our little house in our German village, I’ve mentioned to my husband multiple times about how we should take a drive and go find the hospital so that we know where it is in case there is an emergency and to drive around our village to familiarize ourselves with our surroundings. Although it would be easy, I can’t put all the blame on him for not doing this before we actually needed it. Our excuses have always ranged from being to tired to not budgeting enough gas money in that pay period for the extra trip.




So last night we found ourselves in the car, late in the evening, kids are buckled into their car seats and lit up like rockets despite it being past their bedtime, I’m in pain, my husband is functioning off of 4 hours of sleep and we were driving to a hospital that we had little knowledge about, in a foreign country no less. It sure was an adventure. We made it there of course, but not without deciding at the last minute to drive the extra half hour to the rumored better hospital and getting completely lost, only to realize we were going in the right direction the whole time.

Once we found a parking spot at the Klinikum, which we found out last night is the German name for hospital, we noticed the meter machine right away. I fished ALL of the euro change out of my wallet that I could find and managed to understand the directions on the meter even though they were in German. Putting our first German meter ticket on the dashboard was slightly exciting and to us it was like a German "high five." We found the entrance to the Klinikum, and lucky for us, the man at the desk spoke English and was able to direct us to the next floor where the Emergency Room was located. Once there, despite the language barrier, the nice German ladies were able to figure out where I needed to go and off we went again. Then, to our luck again, the Dr. that helped me spoke perfect English as well. Regardless of the hour, and the reason, overall, it was a very pleasant first experience at a German Hospital.

It was refreshing to be reminded how much my husband and I complement each other in an emergency, but I wanted to write this story today to remind everyone that when you get to your new duty station PLEASE take a few hours and find the local hospital in case of an emergency, and familiarize yourself with your surroundings, especially if you live anywhere overseas. While everything worked out okay last night, it could have gone a lot smoother for all of us if we knew the route beforehand. I know it’s probably common sense to some, but sometimes, it’s good to be reminded of the most basic safety precautions.

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