Wednesday, October 28, 2009

The Ugly

I don't know why I thought I could handle this deployment with grace. The rest of my life is crumbs, mess, and stress, so why did I think that I would suddenly turn into super mom when my husband left? We seem to have skipped the Good and the Bad and gone straight to the Ugly.

I am exhausted, worn out, and frustrated. I really thought that if I was prepared and upbeat we would skate through the deployment unscathed. Instead, there are crying children, angry children, puke, blood, and lots of Mommy tears. My six year old is crying, my four year old is angry, and my two year old has started hitting kids at preschool. Thankfully our youngest, is oblivious to the swirling turmoil in the house.

I wanted so desperately to thrive during this time and I feel like I am struggling to survive. How could I have forgotten how hard this is? I am trying to keep my head up and focus on using the resources that the Army and friends provide. It is so much easier to give advice then it is to take it.

The moral of this story is that Deployments Suck!

5 comments:

Shayla said...

My husband hasn't even left for Basic Training yet & I'm already feeling my strength tested... I love this blog & appreciate your honesty. I hope & pray that tomorrow will be a better day for you!

Kathleen said...

yeah, advice is easy to dole out, a whole lot harder to take. I think as a mom, we have those times and they feel awful. Often we are doing better than we think we are. Hang in there Sarah. Sometimes nothing more can be said. Prayers go out for you!

MelanieK said...

Prayers go out to you. You will get into the routine eventually and you are a strong woman and super momma :) Hang in there

Secretia said...

You could start a journal, write as much as you want everyday in it, you can do it long hand, or on the computer word processor using Word or Wordpad, just your computer, not online. It may help to get it all written down.

Secretia (Secret Story Time)

SabrinaT said...

Just wanted to say I agree Deployments suck! Somehow we make it through.

(((((HUGS))) to you and your kids!

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