The ill fated trip (pun intended)

The other day I decided to pack up the munchkins and head to a post with a large commissary. The commissary near us is sufficient, but from time to time I want a larger selection. We all loaded up in the car and hit the road. I think there is a movie formula where the driver starts the trip by looking at the gas gauge and noting that they are almost out of gas, but decides to get gas further up the road, which leads them into some kind of high jinx and someone ends up in a trash can or in jail. I just knew that gas would be cheaper on post which is about thirty minutes away. Well let me tell you, it is almost impossible to drive onto an Army post and just find buildings. At least it is for me, I drove and drove and drove and panicked a little and drove some more. Seriously, some Army posts are huge and if you get off the beaten path, you start driving past loading docks and old WWII buildings and you start wondering if you have stumbled into an FTX or a Land Nav course. I found the old gas station which introduced a whole new level of panic, because I couldn't help but wonder whether there was gas on post at all, and could I even make it back off of post to a civy gas station.
I finally made enough U-turns and turn arounds to locate the gas station. Now several times while we were driving all over creation, my two year old would cry out in total misery. I didn't think much of it, and I simply used my soothing mommy voice to tell him we were almost there and to hang on. Well about the time we pull up to get in line at the gas station, he is crying again and I turn just in time to see him yak all over himself and his car seat. I jump out throw open the door of the van and start looking for something to blot with and for the wipes. I stripped him down to his diaper and got the car seat out of the car. I was trying to take the cover off so I could put it in a plastic bag, but I just couldn't make myself touch the yucky strap, I just couldn't do it. Now I am no shrinking violet, but for some reason at that very moment I just could not touch the strap. So to speed up the story a little I tried to get our four year old to sit in the van seat with a grown up seat belt which he thought was fantastic until he found out that meant that his little brother would be sitting in his car seat, no go. So I got gas and strapped mount Vesuvius into the seat with a grown up seat belt. Fortunately the PX was just across the street. I decided to buy a new car seat because our nine month old's feet are hanging off of the end of the infant carrier and we needed a new one any way, so this seemed like the perfect time.
I loaded up the three boys, C in the stroller, S (aka Vomitus) in the backpack on my back and the oldest walking. I put the puky car seat on top of the van because it was about 100 degrees and I didn't want it to stink up the car. By the time we figured out that the car seats are in the PX not the PXtra the oldest decided that his feet were not working and he simply could no longer walk. So I loaded him in a cart which meant I was pushing the stroller in front, and pulling the cart behind me with a giant car seat box balanced precariously on top because the box was so big it would not even wedge into the cart. One lady offered to help which was really nice. Pretty much everyone else cut me a wide berth.
Now having three kids under the age of four involves a lot of logistics. Who to put where so I can do x. Well let me tell you that changing out a car seat while wearing a thirty pound toddler on your back with a baby who is hungry and a four year old who is not happy because he did not get a donut when we passed Dunkin Donuts is a little challenging. When my husband called I still had the car seat on the van roof, one kid in the backpack, the baby in the car crying, the oldest in his car seat crying, the cart, the giant car seat box ripped open and I was trying to adjust the straps on the seat. I finally got the new seat in and got everyone strapped in. Here's an FYI, the PX has an extra large bag that you can almost fit an entire car seat into, which will definitely cut down on the odor. I think it only took me twenty minutes to get off of post. Oh I never went to the commissary, and gas was ten cents more expensive on post then one of the civy gas stations I passed. So next time you head out on a trip and you look down at the gas gauge and it is on empty, get gas as soon as possible, and don't go down into a dark basement to check on a noise.